It's April 12th, 2021 at 7:00pm. You have just finished making dinner and eating with your roommates before the three of you decided to be good students and go do homework. What do you do?
[[clean the kitchen]]
[[go to your desk]]
You made dinner AND cleaned up? Are you sure you're a college student? Anyway, great job on the kitchen, but it's now 7:30pm and you still have homework. What do you do?
[[check your phone]]
[[go to your desk]]Now that wasn't so hard, was it? You already feel like a more accomplished student sitting in front of your computer. What do you want to work on?
[[reading notes]]
[[creative project]]
You see you have two notifications, one from text messages and one from Canvas. Which do you click on?
[[canvas]]
[[texts]]It's a grade update from LaBreche! And not a great one! You should probably go do your homework.
[[go to your desk]]
ignore it and [[go on tiktok]]You have one text from your Mom that reads: "Hey honey! Hope the last few weeks of classes are going well! Call me when you get a chance to talk <3"
[[call your mom]]
[[go to your desk]]The next time you look at the clock it's 12:30am. You're starting to get tired. What do you do?
[[go to your desk]]
[[go to bed]]The next morning you go to class unprepared and end up confused the entire time. What do you mean Moll and Mary are two different people? Better luck next Thursday.
[[start]] again?Your mother is so happy to hear from you! You spend a few hours on the phone before she finally lets you go. The clock reads 10:00pm, and you're starting to feel tired after such a busy day of sitting through Zoom calls.
[[go to bed]]
[[go to your desk]] You manage to get through all the readings and write a couple of notes on everything, but as always, you find yourself drawn to one part more than the rest. Which do you like reading the most?
Mary Frith's [[Appearance]] at the Consistory Court
John Chamberlain's [[Letter]]
Excerpts from [[The Roaring Girl]]Hey -_- that's what I'm doing. If we split up this work it'll be easier.
do your [[reading notes]]
[[go on tiktok]] Same here, I loved this part of the homework. Make sure to write down some lines to bring up in class tomorrow.
-//"This day and places the said Mary appeared personally and then and there voluntarily confessed that she had long frequented all or most of the disorderly and licentious places in this city"// (147)
-//"... in man's apparel, and in her boots and with a sword by her side,"// (147)
-//"... with her petticoat tucked up about her in the fashion of a man, with a man's cloak on her, to the great scandal of diverse persons who understood the same, and to the disgrace of all womanhood."//(148)
Good notes! But you're starting to feel a little tired.
[[get some rest]]
[[stay up]]This one was real interesting to read.Make sure to write down some lines to bring up in class tomorrow.
-//"Moll Cutpurse, a notorious baggage (that used to go in men's apparel and challenged the field of diverse gallants) was brought to the same place, where she wept bitterly and seemed very penitent,"// (120)
-//"...but it is since doubted she was maudlin drunk, being discovered to have tippled of three quarts of sack before she came to her penance."// (120)
Good notes! But you're starting to feel a little tired.
[[get some rest]]
[[stay up]]Can't go wrong with a play! Make sure to write down some lines to bring up in class tomorrow.
-//"Or will you vouchsafe to kiss the lip of a cup of rich Orleans in the buttery amongst our waiting-women?"// (9)
-//"Ere she was all made 'Tis woman more than man, / Man more than woman,"// (16)
-//"If the wife go in breeches, the man must wear long coats like a fool."// (37)
Good notes! But you're starting to feel a little tired.
[[get some rest]]
[[stay up]]You wake up the next morning well rested and ready for class. You have your notes ready to go as class begins and then discussion starts. You bring up a few points from your reading, and after considering what you've said Professor LaBreche nods his head and says:
[["Absolutely"]]You did your work, you deserve to stay up a little bit. You end up talking with your roommates around 11:00pm and decide a latenight trip is what you need to relax. Where do you go?
Driving down the [[highway]] with the windows down
Down the street to the [[gas station]] to get a drink(align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Congrats! You've won the LaBreche Simulator!]You and your friends are so overwhelmed by the freedom you have as young adults that you end up driving all night and are in another state by the next morning. This experience will be a story you tell your children in the far future, but as for now... You miss class.
[[start]] again?It's a short, fun walk down to the gas station. The night air is cool and you find yourself enjoying this moment much more without the weight of homework on your shoulders. You find your favorite drink to buy:
[[red bull]]
[[sweet tea]]
[[ginger ale]]
[[dr pepper]]
[[fancy water]]
[[twisted tea]]Why are you having that much caffeine when you've already finished your work?? You end up wide awake the whole night and don't fall asleep until 5:30am, and then sleep through your class.
[[start]] again?Why are you having that much caffeine when you've already finished your work?? You end up wide awake the whole night and don't fall asleep until 5:30am, and then sleep through your class.
[[start]] again?I could be dying from every possible disease but one sip of ginger-ale would fix me. Excellent choice, also there's no caffeine, so you go home and [[get some rest]] Oh, you and I are gonna get along great. And Dr. Pepper doesn't have that much caffeine, so while you're awake a little bit longer than you planned, you manage to [[get some rest]] Okay moneybags! You enjoy your fancy water as you walk home, then decide to [[get some rest]] On a Monday night? I guess it is college... Anyway, you black out halfway into the can and by the time you come to you're half naked in your shower with the water soaking into your socks. You don't go to class in the morning.
[[start]] again?